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Teach them how to treat you

Oft in new relationships all is going along swimmingly until...the abrupt and inevitable first tiff.  I used to get so disappointed when my new love interest failed to treat me the way I felt I deserved and felt disenfranchised having to school them in 'Relationship 101.'

I have, since, learned to think of these moments as opportunities to teach my new partner how to treat me.  This is not the time to pretend you have no needs just to appear easy breezy.  Honor your authentic needs by addressing them and your partner will likely respect them too.  

We are each individuals and your new partner hasn't 'learned you' yet...learned what you want, need, your deal breakers, and what chaps your hide.  This is your opportunity to make it clear.  Your suitor has a past and their last partner had different standards and particularities than you.  So use this moment.  Take advantage of this rift to learn more about each other.  If they show up perpetually 30 minutes late and this irks the heck outta ya, let them know. (And for optimal receptivity, pick your battles and timing wisely, sandwich complaints between compliments, and choose a tone that fits the crime.) Ask for what you want, and for best results, speak from your heart.  

It's so much easier to voice your boundaries and preferences in the beginning before you're wholly invested and resentments start to mount.  Also, it's an easy way to gauge how much your partner cares about you.  If you voice a concern, do they carry on with the status quo or receptively make changes? 

Men especially just want to know women's rules of engagement, so make it clear.  And also clearly reinforce what you appreciate about them.  Give 'em a road map to your heart and set up your new mate and relationship for success!

Source: https://www.facebook.com/findloveatlast
Newer:The fastest way to heal your pastOlder:What's your couple word?
PostedNovember 22, 2014
AuthorDr. Holly Battey

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